People love being around positive people, people who sincerely care for them (A listener, a problem solver, etc…), and as well as people who are being their genuine self.
So, how are we able to shine through our genuine self, and how are we able to attract more of the people who are being genuine to us?
A story to relate to (Try visualising this):
Months ago, I bought a mobile phone casing which was beautifully coated by a shiny blue coating, and it looked exquisite! After using it for a few months, the coating started peeling off (with flakes sticking on to my palm), and it became less attractive as what it used to be. Instead of replacing it with a new casing, I decided to try to “refurbish” the casing (by removing all of its coatings). Upon completion of the removal, the non-coated casing looks astonishingly beautiful (on the phone) with its clear hard cover plastic encasing the phone, displaying the elegance of the original mobile phone’s design!
If you hide away your true self,
people will not be able to know & love who you really are
In the current society, there are many cases similar to my short story where:
- 1. There are people who tried putting themselves up with a false front, going all out to try to please others (They are often seen as a nice person – E.g. Entertainer, Clown, etc…), and such often requires a high amount of effort and energy to sustain the “appearance”. What happens is that at a certain point, this person would feel tired keeping up to such a behavior (If there are no reciprocation from people), and when the “coating peels off”, others might see such changes in a negative light and some might even begin to distant themselves even before trying to find out what happened (Most of them would say something such as: “You have changed”, however, there are also cases where their friends would really care to find out what had happened).
- 2. There are also people who appeared to be very positive and helpful, but once they are “off the stage”, they started complaining about the people who they have helped (In this case, the casing would look bad even after the coating has been removed – unless some “cleaning up” is done).
Displaying genuine personality is important to oneself in term of mental health
(without the need to put on a “mask” which could cause the person to be confused on who they are on the inside).
Shining through genuine personality –
Have you encountered any person who is warm-hearted, and always seem to be helpful without any ulterior motive, and somehow for such a person (apart from the observation of their facial expression or even micro-expressions), your 6th senses seem to be able to tell you if the person was genuine to you.
Now, think about how this person would make you feel, and wouldn’t that be something that could attract you to be a better genuine person in front of them? What follows next is like a chain reaction, you too will then be able to attract people who are genuine to you (people who love you for who you are).
(Apart from being genuine, it is important that a person is continually seeking to improve themselves to become a better person, a better friend, a better colleague, a better spouse, etc…) “Click on link to read on: Self-improvement project – a change for the better”
Lastly, the key to genuine positivity is the presence of positive reinforcements and reciprocity (The motivating factor for people to do more of what’s good).
Author: Kendray Lau